Stop nosy people in their tracks with these witty comebacks that make them regret prying into your business.

Some people have no shame when it comes to prying into your personal life. They’ll poke and prod about your relationships, money, or even your body like it’s their business. It’s uncomfortable, it’s rude, and frankly, it needs to stop.
But instead of letting them put you on the spot, you can turn the tables with a quick-witted response that leaves them speechless. A little sass goes a long way in reminding nosy people to mind their own business.
1. “Wow, you’re really invested in my personal life!”

Sometimes, the best way to shut down a nosy question is to point out just how nosy it is. This response makes it clear that their curiosity has crossed a line, but it does so with a touch of humor. It puts them on the spot without outright confrontation. Most people will feel a little embarrassed and quickly change the subject. And if they don’t? Well, at least now they know you’re not playing along.
2. “Why do you ask?”

Flipping the question back on them is a subtle power move. It forces them to explain why they’re prying, which often makes them realize how inappropriate they’re being. Some might backtrack immediately, while others might awkwardly try to justify themselves. Either way, this response puts you in control of the conversation. Plus, it’s a great way to buy yourself a moment if you need to think of an escape plan.
3. “That’s an interesting question. What made you think of that?”

This is a slightly more polished version of “Why do you ask?” It keeps the tone light while making them reflect on their own curiosity. People who ask personal questions often don’t realize how intrusive they sound. By shifting the focus onto them, you make them aware of their nosiness without being rude. If they stumble over their words or try to change the subject, you’ll know they got the message loud and clear.
4. “I don’t remember signing up for a tell-all interview.”

If someone is grilling you like they’re an investigative journalist, this comeback adds a little humor to the situation. It subtly calls out their intrusive behavior while keeping things playful. Most people will laugh, realize they’ve overstepped, and drop the topic. And if they don’t? Feel free to follow up with an exaggerated “Should I grab a microphone for you?” That should do the trick.
5. “That’s private, but I’d love to hear about your experience with it.”

This is a great way to set a boundary while throwing the question right back at them. Many people who pry into others’ lives aren’t so comfortable when the tables are turned. If they dodge the question, you’ll know they weren’t asking out of genuine interest. If they do share, at least you’ve shifted the spotlight off yourself. Either way, you’ve successfully shut down their nosy question without making it awkward.
6. “If I wanted to talk about that, you’d already know.”

This one is short, direct, and makes a strong point. If you haven’t brought something up before, there’s probably a reason for it. Nosy people often assume they have a right to information just because they’re curious. This response reminds them that sharing personal details is your choice, not theirs. It also makes it clear that if you ever feel like talking about the topic, you’ll do so on your own terms.
7. “You’re bold to ask that!”

Sometimes, all you need to do is highlight just how gutsy their question is. This response isn’t aggressive, but it definitely lets them know they’ve crossed a line. Most people will get the hint and back off immediately. And if they don’t? You can always follow it up with a playful “Are you always this nosy, or am I just special today?” That should make them rethink their approach.
8. “I’d rather not get into that.”

If you want to keep things polite and straightforward, this is a perfect go-to. It sets a clear boundary without leaving much room for pushback. Some people might try to press for more, but you don’t owe them an explanation. If they keep pushing, just repeat yourself with a firm smile. Most people will get the message after the second time and move on to a different topic.
9. “You must be really comfortable with me to ask something like that.”

This response puts the focus back on them and makes them question whether they should feel comfortable enough to ask. It subtly reminds them that not every conversation needs to be an open book. The best part? It works on both acquaintances and close friends. With strangers, it makes them second-guess their overfamiliarity. With friends or family, it gives you a chance to set some healthy boundaries.
10. “Oh, you don’t actually expect me to answer that, do you?”

A little playfulness goes a long way in making people realize their question was out of line. This response works well because it acknowledges the absurdity of what they just asked. It also puts the responsibility back on them to justify their curiosity. Most people will laugh it off or quickly backtrack, realizing they’ve overstepped. If they do keep pushing, you can always hit them with a follow-up: “Nice try, but nope!”
11. “That’s a bit too personal for me.”

Not every comeback needs to be witty—sometimes, a simple and honest statement is the best option. This response is polite but firm, making it clear that you’re not comfortable with the question. It’s especially effective in professional or social settings where you want to keep things respectful. If the person respects boundaries, they’ll drop it immediately. If they don’t, that’s a red flag that they might not deserve your time or energy.
12. “I could tell you, but then I’d have to charge you a consulting fee.”

Adding humor to an uncomfortable situation can take the tension out of it while still shutting the person down. This response is playful but makes it clear that your personal life isn’t up for discussion. Most people will laugh and move on, realizing that their question was probably a little too much. And if they keep prying? Well, feel free to add, “I take payments in cash, by the way.”
13. “I’ll answer that if you tell me your most embarrassing secret first.”

This one is perfect for calling out double standards. People who ask personal questions often don’t realize how invasive they’re being—until they’re put in the same position. Turning the tables like this forces them to consider how they would feel answering something so direct. Most people will laugh and back off, realizing they don’t actually want to play that game. If they do answer? Hey, at least now you have some dirt on them too.
14. “That’s classified information, and you don’t have clearance.”

This playful response makes it clear that your personal business is your business. It’s a lighthearted way to remind people that not everything is up for discussion. The best part? It works in almost any setting—whether it’s family, friends, or even nosy coworkers. Most people will chuckle and get the hint. And if they don’t? Well, just smile and say, “Sorry, I don’t make the rules!” before moving on.