They hide behind a mask of charm, but their cruel tendencies reveal the disturbing truth.
Some people don’t just have a mean streak—they enjoy being cruel. They get a secret thrill from putting others down, stirring up drama, and making life harder for those around them. You might not notice it at first because they can be charming, even likable.
But over time, their true nature slips through the cracks. If you’ve ever felt like someone was mean on purpose, you’re probably right. Here are 13 dark truths about people who take pleasure in being cruel.
1. They don’t just lash out—they plan their cruelty.
Some people say mean things in the heat of the moment. Not these folks. They think ahead, picking the perfect time and place to deliver a cutting remark or passive-aggressive jab. They calculate how to hit where it hurts the most. Sometimes, they’ll even plant little seeds of doubt or insecurity in your mind, then sit back and enjoy the damage. It’s not an accident—it’s a twisted form of entertainment for them.
2. They pretend they were “just joking” to avoid consequences.
When they get called out, they never own up to their behavior. Instead, they act like you’re the problem for “taking it too seriously.” It’s their favorite escape route. They’ll say something nasty, watch the reaction, then play the innocent victim. “Oh, come on, can’t you take a joke?” is their go-to line. The truth? It was never a joke. It was a carefully disguised insult, and they meant every single word.
3. They feel powerful when they make others feel small.
For them, being mean isn’t just a habit—it’s a power trip. Making someone feel insecure, embarrassed, or unworthy gives them a twisted sense of control. They feed off the discomfort they create. Seeing someone squirm after a cruel comment or doubt themselves after a snide remark gives them an ego boost. It’s not about proving a point or expressing frustration—it’s about making sure they feel superior, no matter the cost.
4. They seek out people who won’t call them out.
They’re not randomly cruel to just anyone. They pick their targets carefully. If you’re kind, forgiving, or tend to avoid conflict, you’re exactly the type of person they latch onto. They know you’re less likely to push back, which means they can keep being mean without facing consequences. But the second someone stands up to them? They’ll either play the victim or disappear, searching for an easier target to manipulate.
5. They stir up drama just to sit back and watch the chaos.
They don’t just enjoy being mean to people directly—they love turning others against each other. Spreading rumors, twisting words, and creating tension between friends or coworkers is part of their routine. They get a kick out of watching relationships fall apart and seeing people argue over the seeds of conflict they planted. And the worst part? They often act completely innocent, pretending they had nothing to do with the mess they caused.
6. They can be incredibly charming when they need to be.
Not all mean people are openly nasty. Some are shockingly charismatic. They know how to turn on the charm, make people laugh, and seem like the most fun person in the room. This makes their cruelty even more insidious because, by the time you realize how awful they are, they’ve already convinced others that they’re a great person. If you speak up, people might not believe you—because they’ve only seen the “good” side.
7. They fake kindness when they want something.
Watch how they act when they need a favor. Suddenly, they’re the sweetest, most considerate person you’ve ever met. They’ll compliment you, act interested in your life, and make you feel special. But the second they get what they want? The mask drops. They go right back to their mean, dismissive ways. Their kindness isn’t real—it’s just another tool they use to manipulate and take advantage of people when it benefits them.
8. They never take responsibility for the pain they cause.
Apologizing is not in their vocabulary. If they do say sorry, it’s empty, insincere, or followed by excuses. They might even blame you for how they treated you. “I wouldn’t have said that if you hadn’t…” is a classic line. No matter what happens, they refuse to see themselves as the problem. In their mind, they’re always justified in their cruelty, and if you’re hurt, it’s somehow your fault—not theirs.
9. They get jealous when others are happy.
Someone else’s success, joy, or good fortune feels like a personal attack to them. They can’t just be happy for people—they have to find a way to tear them down. Maybe they make a backhanded compliment, minimize the achievement, or bring up something negative to sour the moment. They thrive in negativity, so when others are genuinely happy, it reminds them of everything they lack. Instead of fixing their own life, they’d rather ruin someone else’s happiness.
10. They hold grudges and love revenge.
Forgiveness? Not in their world. They remember every slight, real or imagined, and they will make you pay for it—eventually. They don’t always lash out immediately. Sometimes, they wait weeks, months, or even years before getting their revenge. And when they do, they make sure it stings. If they can’t get back at you directly, they’ll find other ways to make your life harder, whether it’s spreading rumors, turning people against you, or sabotaging your success.
11. They’re the first to dish it out but can’t take it.
They love making cruel jokes at others’ expense, pointing out flaws, and mocking people. But if someone turns the tables? They lose it. Suddenly, they’re the victim, and you’re the terrible person. They expect others to laugh along when they’re being mean, but the second they feel even slightly criticized, they get defensive, angry, or even lash out. They can dish it out all day, but taking it? That’s a different story.
12. They use guilt as a weapon to control people.
Some of them aren’t outwardly aggressive—they use guilt instead. They’ll make you feel like a terrible person for standing up for yourself, setting boundaries, or not giving them what they want. They frame themselves as the victim to make you feel bad, even when they’re the one who caused the problem. If you start to pull away, they’ll suddenly act hurt, as if you’re the one being unfair. It’s just another manipulation tactic.
13. They never change—unless life forces them to.
Some people grow, learn, and become better with time. But those who enjoy being mean? They stay the same unless something major shakes up their life. Maybe they lose friends, face real consequences, or hit rock bottom. Even then, change isn’t guaranteed. Most of the time, they just find new ways to manipulate, new people to control, and new tactics to hide their cruelty. The best way to deal with them? Stop giving them a place in your life.